I got bored and wrote him back:
Dear Mr. Moonwhisper,
My wife and I were having a cup of chamomile tea and the topic of my advertisement came up.
The memory of your adjective ridden email came back to me and i still feel as though I'm having trouble with my mental clarity.
One phrase in particular befuddles me: "dick splash".
I asked my elderly grandmother what a "dick splash" was and she just screamed at me and shut the shower curtain.
In the confusion, she had a spill so now we're at the hospital. Considering the anatomical nature of the phrase, I suppose i can go ask one of the doctors here.
That's what I'll do, I'll get back to you shortly so we can clear this whole thing up.
Btw, have you changed your mind about the mercedes?
Talk soon!
To which he replied:
Dear white man:
"Dick Splash" is a phrase I heard on the big screen at a movie theater watching the new Superman movie. I honestly do not know what this phrase means but it sounded original and I used it.
As for the Mercedes: this poor Indian still must use horse and cannot afford white man horseless carriage. Wish I had land to trade you but white man stole that from me too.
I will smoke a prayer pipe for your injured loved one tonight and send my thoughts of healing in the smoke as it makes its way to the spirit world.
I think I like this guy.
(Played WoW for many years, meet my wife playing that stupid game)