i couldnt resist....;)

n8thgr8

n8thgr8

Well-known member
Dec 6, 2006
587
0
Colorado, Guam
Home sick today, and I can't believe I watched the WHOLE thing! thats 3 minutes and 25 seconds that I'll never get back...
At least it wasn't an EAGLE shirt montage! (hmmm, what song would go with that one?)
 
I HATE PONIES

I HATE PONIES

Well-known member
Aug 3, 2006
4,864
0
This kinda sounds like a Tillery infomercial with Garret as the spokesman.:rofl:


This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.

I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.
Click to expand...
 
B

barefoot

Guest
mike, this is the link the video reminded me of but i couldn't remember where the hell i saw it....thanks!
 
Mike_Rupp

Mike_Rupp

Well-known member
Mar 26, 2004
3,604
0
Mercer Island, WA
I HATE PONIES said:
Then again... The same people by their milk on-line and the reviews are just as disturbing.:eek:

http://www.amazon.com/Tuscan-Whole-Milk-Gallon-128/dp/B00032G1S0/ref=pd_sbs_a_2/181-6679240-5545353
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Here's a wonderful review:

"He always brought home milk on Friday.

After a long hard week full of days he would burst through the door, his fatigue hidden behind a smile. There was an icy jug of Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz in his right hand. With his left hand he would grip my waist - I was always cooking dinner - and press the cold frostiness of the jug against my arm as he kissed my cheek. I would jump, mostly to gratify him after a time, and smile lovingly at him. He was a good man, a wonderful husband who always brought the milk on Friday, Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz.

Then there was that Friday, the terrible Friday that would ruin every Friday for the rest of my life. The door opened, but there was no bouyant greeting - no cold jug against the back of my arm. There was no Tuscan Whole Milk in his right hand, nor his left. There came no kiss. I watched as he sat down in a kitchen chair to remove his shoes. He wore no fatigue, but also no smile. I didn't speak, but turned back to the beans I had been stirring. I stirred until most of their little shrivelled skins floated to the surface of the cloudy water. Something was wrong, but it was vague wrongness that no amount of hard thought could give shape to.

Over dinner that night I casually inserted,"What happened to the milk?"
"Oh,"he smiled sheepishly, glancing aside,"I guess I forgot today."

That was when I knew. He was tired of this life with me, tired of bringing home the Tuscan Whole Milk, 1 Gallon, 128 fl oz. He was probably shoveling funds into a secret bank account, looking at apartments in town, casting furtive glances at cashiers and secretaries and waitresses. That's when I knew it was over. Some time later he moved in with a cashier from the Food Mart down the street. And me? Well, I've gone soy."

Brilliant! What's great is that 2057 people voted on whether or not that review was helpful.
 
Matt Kendrick

Matt Kendrick

Well-known member
Sep 10, 2005
562
5
Garden Grove, CA
Mike_Rupp said:
http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B002HJ377A/ref=cm_cr_pr_product_top

Read the reviews. There is some priceless stuff in there.
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thanks mike, there's an hour of my life i'll never get back...


Call of the wild, May 15, 2009
By K. Bethea "yo yo pow" (new world crack adict) - See all my reviews

Once appreciating myself as a man of the wilderness, I adorned the wolf shirt and all its glory. As I hiked into the Oregon wilderness, I felt I had become unionized with the wolf sole itself. I hear the wolf howl, and so I howl. I see the wolf eat poo, and so I also eat the poo. The wolf ran so swift, and so I ran into a snowy drift. And I realized with the cold of the winter snow, that I was a wilderness stow. Away.
Away into the snowy dune of doom. I felt my limbs go knumb with the warm cold of pooy scold. And I realized with all there was to realize...that I was born again into an entity. A crazy [...] up entity of myself of wonder. Amen
 
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