Best Land Rover Jokes

[Montana]

...When you consider removing the bulbs from your dash actually fixing the problem(s).

...When you rationalize that men who don't gawk at your truck "must be gay."

When see hot women gawking at your Rover and envision them hooking up with you...with the vision ending in the two of you taking "long walks together."

You comment, "Try and follow me bitch" every time you see an H2 or Jeep. (Even if you're alone)

You keep spare Rover parts in your Rover that don't even match you're year, make or model.

You spend more than 10 hours a week looking and buying spare Rover parts on eBay...regardless of whether they match your year, make or model.

You have to wipe the grease off your hands every time you sit down to post on D-Web.

 

[agbuckle98]

...

You comment, "Try and follow me bitch" every time you see an H2 or Jeep. .

H2's especially if they have big stupid 22's on them. And I call the dude gay.

 

[Montana]

You've heard the words, "Are you sitting down?" before being given a quote on a repair.

Even though you make $150,000 a year, you've looked into attending a Rover Tech School to save yourself some money.

You actually rationalized the cost of swapping your V8 for a TDi because it'll save you money on gas...

 

[Asolo3j]

You know your a rover owner if....

You still maintain a friendship with the original owner and send him updated pics to show recent mods or that you are keeping it true to heritage.

You've ever asked for Rover parts for X-mas, Birthdays...

 

[XtremeMarine]

When you ask your future father in law for his FC 101 as his daughter's dowery.

When your future wife sends you photos of said 101 every time "dad" takes the tarp off to look at it.

When you think you've hit the jackpot with your girl because she's already used to a household full of rovers, and warehouses full of rover parts.

When your future wife refuses to make you sleep in the doghouse when she's mad at you; simply because the Series' are out there too, (and you'd enjoy it).

When "the Talk" from your father in law is about making sure the vehicles in the family - stay in the family.

When you can rationalize ordering Rover parts, because you're calling your future wife at work; (Oh, honey, by the way; can you have Dad send me one of these...)

 

[ptschram]

This is fricken WAY better than I had hoped for...Turd over-the-top. (And I thought I was the only person who had to drain the indicator lights on my truck.)

Mine are self-draining!

An 1/8" drill bit works wonders for keeping turn signals working (Ge,, I wonder if this is why my turn signals are all wonky?)

 

[DiscoveryXD]

When you ask your future father in law for his FC 101 as his daughter's dowery.

When your future wife sends you photos of said 101 every time "dad" takes the tarp off to look at it.

When you think you've hit the jackpot with your girl because she's already used to a household full of rovers, and warehouses full of rover parts.

When your future wife refuses to make you sleep in the doghouse when she's mad at you; simply because the Series' are out there too, (and you'd enjoy it).

When "the Talk" from your father in law is about making sure the vehicles in the family - stay in the family.

When you can rationalize ordering Rover parts, because you're calling your future wife at work; (Oh, honey, by the way; can you have Dad send me one of these...)

is that just a list of personal experiences? haha

 

[XtremeMarine]

LMAO !!! You've got it ! "If you can't laugh at yourself, then you've no right in laughing at others." LOL. :cheers:

 

[KevinNY]

Oh, no, resist.... No, Cant' RESIST...


STEVE YOUNG

 

[DiscoveryXD]

Oh, no, resist.... No, Cant' RESIST...


STEVE YOUNG

haha, i gave him a "Decade of Discovery" Badge for free, and he said he would send me a rover T shirt.

i never got it...

I can name a few others that i sent a badge or other stuff to and had the same result.

Don't promise shit if you can't/won't send it out

 

[XtremeMarine]

For XD, the wife's favorite:

When you end up having to ride on the roofrack, because it's Her turn to drive off-road. LOL.:smilelol:

 

[DiscoveryXD]

you let her drive?

uh oh.....

 

[rmuller]

When you ask your future father in law for his FC 101 as his daughter's dowery.

When your future wife sends you photos of said 101 every time "dad" takes the tarp off to look at it.

When you think you've hit the jackpot with your girl because she's already used to a household full of rovers, and warehouses full of rover parts.

When your future wife refuses to make you sleep in the doghouse when she's mad at you; simply because the Series' are out there too, (and you'd enjoy it).

When "the Talk" from your father in law is about making sure the vehicles in the family - stay in the family.

When you can rationalize ordering Rover parts, because you're calling your future wife at work; (Oh, honey, by the way; can you have Dad send me one of these...)

Or when you end up marrying your parts suppliers daughter

 

[TurdFerguson]

Ryan...LMAO..Good one!

Dan, shall I post the pic of the Roof Rack ride?...lol

Clint..LOL..Aint it nice to bring home some of the water you've crossed!...lol


Here are some I thought of today...

...when you say you're going to leave a fellow enthusiast's home at 8pm but still end up leaving around 11 because you started talking about 4-wheelin again!
...if you're (Dweb member) Landrovered!
...when the auto shops dont have parts for your truck!

 

[maxyedor]

-When you give the valet 10 minutes of instructions before allowing him to park your truck.
-You avoid the mall because you don't fit in the parking structure
-You carry 7quarts of oil in the back "just in case"
-You have a 1000peice fuse assortment in the glovebox, and another in the boot
-When it rains a little outside the truck, it rains a LOT inside
-There is a 3ft breaker bar, an axe, and a large sledge in your truck at all times
-You've been banned from the dealership because you tried to charge the "rock course" in the rain, at 2:30 AM, don't ask
-You have a seperate bank accout just for Rover related expenses
-You want to go to Sulihull for spring break
-Your mom calls to tell you she saw a Disco 1 with a lift on the freeway, but it's not as cool as yours.
-Your car depreciates faster than your computer

 

[ptschram]

You have seven spare engines.

Three spare transmissions.

Four spare transfer cases.

Spare body parts and window glass for all of your trucks.

When going on a family camping trip, you take a trailer to carry all the spare parts you've taken along.

The UPS driver at your hotel begins to know you by your first name the first day you're there as parts began arriving before you did.

You open a shop fixing them to justify the spare parts you've amassed.

When house shopping, the size of the barn is of greater importance than ANYTHING else.

 

[XtremeMarine]

JC; little brother, if you post up that pic, I will tie you to the brushbar next time we wheel and use YOU as the limb risers! LMAO!!!

To continue:

When the Dealership keeps your CC numbers on file, and only calls to see which one has the most available credit, THIS WEEK.

When you have to buy waterproof lights from your buddy because your trucks front end spends so much time under water it's been dubbed the Yellow submarine.

When the Fedex guy and UPS guy are loved on by your guard dog because they spend more time at your house than you do.

When "speakerphone" is not an option because it gets drowned out by the intake roar of your Mantec.

When you have to link your paypal account to your trust fund so your stuff will ship out from the UK faster.

When co-workers ask what you are "going to do" because they saw another Rover in the county the same color as yours.

When your indy mechanic has YOU on speed dial.

And the finale:

You know you're a Land Rover owner when you order your synthetics directly from the Amsoil warehouse in the 30 gallon drums.

 

[TurdFerguson]

JC; little brother, if you post up that pic, I will tie you to the brushbar next time we wheel and use YOU as the limb risers! LMAO!!!


And the finale:

You know you're a Land Rover owner when you order your synthetics directly from the Amsoil warehouse in the 30 gallon drums.

Ok, nevermind the picture!...LOL

As for the finale!, I just lost is man!!...Funny stuff!!!!

 

[Timmy!!!!!!!]

You know you are a Rover owner:

-When family members travel and call to tel you they saw a RHD Disco in Mexico...
-When everyone at church knows you as the crazy Land Rover owner
-When your doctor's daughter tells you that you are obsessed with Land Rovers ( The Doctor also owns a Rover)
-When random people around town start coming to you with rover issues.
-When you have rover stickers all over your mac laptop and external hard drive.
-When you spot rovers in movies and tell your friends the model...........
-When the previous owner of the disco looks at it and goes oh my goodness what has happened!

 

[Rover Mac]

You know when you are a Rover owner....

Truck will not fit in the garage, too tall and anyway the 2 car garage is full of Rover stuff and camping gear. The German sports car sits in the driveway- and that is considered the economy car when compared with the Rover's mpg.

9 year old son has a desk and chair in the garage to do his homework, while i work on the truck.

Regardless of how many tools you have, you still find reasons to buy more, or do not have the correct tool for the job. You carry your tools in the truck.

Your yard / landscaping is the natural look- because you would rather work on the Rover. Fired the gardener to spend more $ on upgrades for the Rover.

The UPS driver knows you by name, delivers parts directly to the garage instead of the house.

Late night reading material consists of workshop manuals and engine overhaul manuals along with various LR magazines, no interior design or architecture coffee table magazines.

The neighbors show bemused tollerance as the dust from the last trip gets washed off the truck and flows down the driveway into the street.

Trying to come up with a suitable response for when i am complemented on my Land Cruiser.

Having my son point out all the LR's on Animal Planet, Discovery Channel, History Channel, etc.

Driving around LA and having my son point out enthusiastically the few off road LR's, and only casually remark on the Carrera GT's, GT 40's, Aston Martins and Italian exotics.

A trip to EE is much more important than going to the hardware store to replace the vise grips currently being used to turn the shower on after the tap broke.

Not sure if it is a possitive when people remark that 'Oh you really do use your LR off road" .

The cocker spaniel has to take a short run up to jump into the back of the truck because of the lift.

Wearing the mechanics scars proudly, or if asked what happened to your hand / arm- "Oh just working on my truck". (finger nail just dropped off after being bashed with a large hammer 2 months ago )

Summer "school" joint father and son project is taking the HAM radio exam

Despite fixing numerous problems, never having time to fix the unimportant bits, sagging headling, headlamp washers, cruise control etc.

Cell phone includes the tow services who will help you get back to civilizaton if the unexpected occurs in the middle of Death Valley, Anza Borrego, Mojave etc.

Reading or posting a reply to this thread and appreciating all too well what is being said

Knowing who Steve Young is by reputation,

Actually really wanting a diesel powered LR, (before gas price increase)

Not even bothering with make and model at the local auto parts store- much easier if i have the generic part number.

Buying tires because they have a trail damage warranty - and checking my auto insurance covers me off road.

While having coffee and practicing 'spotter" hand signals with my son, the waitress thought we were using sign language. and having my son return from a birthday where they went to a monster truck stadium event and was rather less impressed than his friends, but enjoyed the hot dogs.