mbrummal said:
So.... Anyone care to share a few tips for getting out of a speeding ticket?
Well this worked for me a few years ago, and i was definitely guilty.
Driving to Yosemite to hike Half Dome and do some camping, 6am in the morning in Kern County, 4 lane divided and deserted highway, so i want to try out the top end power on my rebuilt and massaged 3.8 E Type,(my daily driver) on triple Weber's, just to see if i had the jetting and mixture correct after a rolling dyno session.
Speedo did not work so no accurate idea of how fast i was going when i notice a white unmarked Ford Mustang approach from the other direction over a rise in the road, i lifted off, looked in my rear view mirror to see the Mustang cross the central divider in a cloud of dust and was rapidly approaching from behind (i had lifted off the gas and was coasting ). Siren on lights flashing so i pull over. A kid in uniform with serious acne, mirror shades and tattoos on his forearms swaggers up to the car and after the usual polite pleasantries = demands for license, insurance and registration the conversation goes something along these lines.
"Do you know how fast you were going ?"
I was probably exceeding the speed limit but not by much according to my speedo (which did not work)
"How fast ?"
85mph according to my speedo
"You were going a lot faster than that, and why did you slow down?"
My speedo said 85mph but it shakes a bit, and if i see a police car with its lights and siren on approaching of course i slow down.
"your speedo must be wrong, are those your original tyres ?"
I sincerely hope not, they would be older than me and most certainly unsafe ( i was very proud of my magnesium centre lock wheels and semi racing but road legal slicks)
"well if those are not the original tyres thats why your speedometer is inaccurate, i am writing you a ticket for 105mph and for not having a front license plate !"
At this point i try to point out that when my car was built front license plates were not required, and the car was probably never issued with one (no idea if that was true, but i did have original black Ca plate on the rear.) I tried to protest the 105mph ticket (i had a few speeding tickets, and 30mph over the limit would not help).
Kern County will not transfer traffic court hearings to LA so i had to drive back up to Kern County after pleading not guilty and having a cop sign off on my front plate fix it ticket, which i returned with my bail cheque. I was really hoping the cop would not turn up, and the case would be dismissed which i thought was my only chance.
The judge first of all addresses my front license plate, i tell him i had the fix it ticket signed off in LA attached with my cheque, which had been cashed so i know it has been received, judge did not believe me so sent the cop out to the parking lot to verify for himself ( DMV issued front plate duct taped to the hood for the occasion).
This then followed a discussion about it not being permanently affixed, i point out there is no place on a E Type to attach a Ca front plate, and i had done the best i could to comply with the fix it ticket, so the judge went to have a look. (Attaching the front plate was something i only did in the car park as an after thought) I had done a slightly better job when getting the fix it ticket signed off in LA months before.
So the judge tells because i do not have an attorney it is up to me to ask the cop questions, so i ask him what made you think i was speeding ?
"I could hear your engine before i could see you and you were going well over 105mph"
So i asked how fast he was going at the time (he was not using radar)
" i was looking at your vehicle not my speedometer"
So in a sudden flash back to a particularly unpleasant school physics teacher i said...
So if you have no idea how fast you were going how is it possible to accurately estimate my speed despite your extensive training and law enforcement experiance (the cop looked 18 yrs old), two moving objects etc.... or you are somehow indeed particularly gifted and can accurately estimate a speed of any car by the engine note, please explain how this is possible.....
Cop cited his extensive training,"brief" service record, and number of tickets he had written .
I asked how many of those instances he had estimated the vehicles speed based on the noise of the engine ( a straight 6 jaguar DOHC engine at full song is a fantastic noise and almost loud enough to mask the terrible gearbox whine)
Judge dismissed the case, and the cop shadowed me out of the parking lot to the Kern County line ( of course this could have been his assigned route, but i doubt it , this guy was seething and of course my speedo still did not work.)
On my way to the National rally a couple of years ago, i was caught for speeding in my RR , and my excuse to the cop , i admitted the speeding and pointed out it was downhill and i did not want to waste the momentum for the climbing the other side so as to increase my mpg, and that my larger tyres caused the speedo to under estimate my true speed he also checked my front plate, and also checked if my tyres extended beyond my wheelarches. That did not work, guilty, mailed the cheque.
Many years ago I once spent a couple of hours in jail after a spirited night drive from London to Glasgow in a Ford sierra Cosworth press launch demonstrator on the old A74, only some frantic pleading, some calls to my editor and fax from Fords friendly PR exec , and their assurances that i would be severely reprimanded, but if i lost my license I would loose my job saved the day. What with speeding cameras, traffic volume and changing attitudes that would not be possible today. The police it turned out were very interested in the "cossie" and while i do not take credit for this, i was later told by the PR exec that several forces placed orders for the car specifically to catch speeders, the jags, and rover SD1 saloons were just not fast enough and that a police Jaguar saloon had tailed me for several miles and been unable to gain ground until i backed off. (i was never formally charged, empty road, and I backed off before coming up on any traffic and any life endangerment was only to myself)